Charlotte Crosby found herself overcome with emotion as she casted her mind back to 2016 when she suffered an ectopic pregnancy.
At the time, the 30-year-old was dating her former Geordie Shore co-star Gaz Beadle who decided to go ahead with filming MTV's EX On The Beach, rather than being at her side.
The pain is still raw for Charlotte, who broke down in tears explaining that she'd never really "forgiven" her ex Gaz for leaving her to go through the terrifying ordeal alone.
In spite of declaring that she has now moved on, the TV star explained that she had "suffered a lot" in the five years that had past.
Still finding it hard to talk about, she finally found the courage to open-up about her deep and inner feelings.
Speaking on her podcast, Values and Vibrators, Charlotte discussed that Gary had been allowed to have his phone during filming due to the very serious circumstances.
She said: "They were like, 'Yeah we'll let Gary have his phone back once a day.'
"But then in the back of my mind, I think every girl will know this, you don't want to tell them to come home, but you want them to be there."
Charlotte explained that she'd longed for Gaz to pack in the filming gig and run to be with her but much to her disappointment, he never did.
"We spoke every other day on the phone and he insisted, 'It's been great nothing has happened with any girls.' Obviously that was a lie. Because when it came on telly shortly afterwards… [breaks down in tears] I don't really need to say any more than that," the reality star added.
Continuing, the starlet said: "I suffered a lot. I lost my organs, I was in hospital, I nearly died and not that you get over it, but just as you start to feel everything is feeling a bit better and it's something that happened but you’re moving on, and then, that TV show comes out.
"We just stopped speaking. The phone calls stopped and that was it really."
After realising she couldn't get over the situation alone, Charlotte sought the help of a psychologist to help her to overcome the traumatic situation that was made worse by Gaz who had cheated on the programme with three other women.
Even though the social media influencer is now in a better headspace and happy to be friends with Gaz now, she certainly isn't about to forgive him any time soon.
She went on: "But I will say now, it sounds so strange to even say this, because it's like crazy even re-talking about everything that he did and how he handled the whole situation.
"I don't even know how I can even say this. I haven't forgiven him, but it kind of is what it is and I don't hold a grudge against him any more.
"Obviously now, five years later, we have spoke a few times.
"As stupid as it sounds, it would be nice to be friends probably again."
Source: Read Full Article