My girlfriend and my mum are at loggerheads and it is causing cracks between us

DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend and my mum are at loggerheads and it is starting to cause cracks in our relationship.

I am 27, my partner is 29 and our son is one year old. Mum offered us her house when our son was born as she is living with my grandad and caring for him.

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It is good of her but she keeps letting herself in and moving stuff around, even stuff that’s ours.

My partner goes mad at me as she doesn’t really get on with my mum anyway.

I lost my job because of Covid and we can’t afford to rent elsewhere. I am stuck in the middle.

My partner just complains and expects me to sort it.

I have talked to Mum, even had rows about it, but nothing changes.

DEIDRE SAYS: Ask your girlfriend and your mum to sit down together with you and talk this through.

Your mum clearly still feels it is her house but it’s your home now and you need privacy.

Tell your mum how much you both appreciate her generosity but ask her to agree set times she will call round and to leave things as you have them arranged.

Invite her to share a meal with you regularly and a bunch of flowers could get that chat off to a good start.

My e-leaflet Standing Up For Yourself will help you be more assertive.

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