I don't want to end my marriage because of our son, but I can't stand my husband

DEAR DEIDRE: I’M not sure why I’m with my partner any more. We no longer have sex.

He’s 39 and I’m 35. We have a son of five but since he’s been born, you can count on one hand the number of times we’ve been intimate.


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I’ve woken up to my partner watching pornography on his phone many times and he isn’t interested in me.

If I try to talk to him about it, he sometimes gets angry and he’ll lash out.

He’s hit me many times now but I still want us to be together. I don’t understand what’s changed.

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He got into bed with me the other night and we were starting to get sexy but then he pushed me away saying: “I’m too tired. I’ve got work tomorrow.”

I feel so rejected – but also I don’t want to be the one breaking us up because of my son.

DEIDRE SAYS: There are red flags flying for me here – your son is the main reason you should be breaking up with this man.

A child growing up in a house of violence will be undoubtedly damaged by it.

This is not love. Your partner is physically and emotionally abusive.

You deserve better. Find help through one of the organisations mentioned in my Abusive Partner support pack.

Sadly, he has made you feel bad about yourself so your self-esteem is at an all-time low. My support pack called Raising Self-Esteem will help.

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